Stranger Danger? Online Safety

By Nancy Willard -- School Library Journal, 3/1/2007

Ally, my 13-year-old daughter has discovered Club Penguin, a virtual environment for kids. Using a penguin avatar, she wanders about the virtual South Pole, where she frequently stops to chat with strangers. Incredibly risky, you say?

After all, you should never communicate with people you don’t know, advises 2smrt4u, the new Internet safety site created by the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children. Reflecting a similar perspective, the I-Safe Internet safety evaluation asked students the following question: “How likely is it that someone you meet online would try to hurt or scare you?” A response of “highly likely” was considered “desirable” by the I-Safe program.

Can we all pause for a moment of common sense?

A new national survey of teenagers conducted by the Pew Internet & American Life Project reveals that more than half (55 percent) of American teenagers aged 12–17 use online social networking sites. Of these youngsters, 91 percent say they use the sites to communicate with friends they see frequently. However, 49 percent say they engage in social networking to make new friends.

The vast majority of these “new friends” are likely other teens who simply want to make contact with people online. There are others, of course, who are dangerous, whether they be adult sexual predators, teens seeking casual “hook-ups,” hate groups, gang recruiters, scam artists, and the like. These individuals tend to employ very sophisticated manipulation techniques to gain youngsters’ trust. And the kids most at risk of being taken in are usually already vulnerable to begin with.

Thus far, prevention methods aimed at keeping kids safe online have been fear based. However, research has demonstrated that “stranger-danger” warnings are generally ineffective. Many teens, recognizing that many adults are afraid of the Internet, simply dismiss these messages as a case of fearing what you do not understand. Moreover, with so much fear-mongering about the Web, youngsters are less likely to report legitimate concerns because they think adults will overreact, blame them, and worst of all, cut off their Internet access.

Librarians, who are so involved in teaching skills related to information literacy, can play an important role here. Adding another skill, “stranger literacy,” media specialists can help teens and children learn to assess the safety and trustworthiness of online encounters. For example, consider the following guidelines.

To prevent unwanted attention while online:

Never post intimate material—that means any content that is sexually related, discloses emotional concerns, or shares problems you are having with your family or friends.
Don’t participate in groups or communities where individuals discuss their emotional or relationship problems, unless it is a moderated group operated by a professional support organization.

To determine the safety of an online stranger:

Consider how and where you met the person.
Critically review the person’s online presence, including details of their messages, and watch for inconsistencies.
Take time to get to know the person. It is difficult to maintain a facade.
Ask others for their opinion.
Watch out for anyone, especially someone older, who sends overly friendly messages, tells you how special or wonderful you are, offers gifts, wants a secret relationship, or tries to turn you against your parents or friends. Save and report suspicious contacts to your parents and to the Web site.

To safely meet with an online stranger:

Never agree to meet without a safety plan that your parents have approved.
Any meeting should be in a public place, with your parent or trusted friends nearby.
Never leave the public place with the stranger.

It is time to move beyond the fear and provide young people with the guidance they need to effectively prevent, detect, and respond to online concerns, including online strangers.

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