First Steps: You've Gotta Have Heart

Can I play too?” Undeniably, a toddler who can approach friends and ask this sophisticated question is well on his way to kindergarten readiness. As it turns out, children who know how to ask for what they want, get along with others, stay calm when faced with frustration, persist when facing difficult tasks, and negotiate for toys or personal space are developing the social and emotional skills they'll need to succeed in school and in life.

Yet, parents and caregivers of young children often believe that school readiness consists only of classic academic skills, such as identifying shapes or recognizing letters and colors. In recent years, discussions of cognitive development have taken precedence over discussions of social-emotional development. But beyond good nutrition and a safe environment, baby's most important need is a dependable, loving relationship with an adult whom they know and trust. Children need to feel secure before they can do anything else. Social and emotional development is the key to all other learning because it serves as the foundation for relationships and interactions that give meaning to children's experiences.

The emotional bonding that begins in the first weeks of life becomes the primary source of a child's security, self-esteem, self-control, social skills, and learning. Parents and caregivers can play a primary role in shaping children's positive social and emotional development by being highly consistent, warm, and nurturing in response to their infants' needs. Children who have a close relationship with a nurturing parent are better able to explore alone, separate when necessary, and operate independently from that parent. Social interactions and their emotional links drive learning in the first five years.

Reading aloud is a nurturing activity that contributes to bonding between parents and children. Plus, reading aloud promotes trust and security in a stimulating environment. Sharing books provides conversational opportunities that not only build a love of books but build a loving relationship, too. Young children are eager to have their parents' close attention, which sharing books together provides. Parents can help nurture this emotional bond with their babies by reading to them every day.

Children's author Mem Fox writes, “The fire of literacy is created by the emotional sparks between a child, a book, and the person reading. It isn't achieved by the book alone, nor by the child alone, nor by the adult who's reading aloud—it's the relationship winding between all three, bringing them together....”

New parents are especially eager to understand their infant's growth and development. The problem is that there is now such a huge cottage industry surrounding brain-based education that parents' interests are directed toward products that allegedly accelerate learning, instead of “old-fashioned” activities, such as reading and cuddling, and talking and listening. Parents need to hear that when a child feels good—loved and cared for—his brain produces higher levels of serotonin, a hormone which enhances brain connections.

The period surrounding the birth of a child offers a special opportunity for libraries to reach first-time parents with this important information. Our New Parent Gift, sent to all first births in our county shortly after baby is born, shares this key information. It includes baby's first library card, a classic baby book, a motivating manual and DVD that share advice on reading to babies, and a guide that introduces our children's programs. In a friendly way, this gift educates parents about early brain development and the vital importance of reading aloud to promote positive relationships. As one new mother shared, “Thank you! This is one of the few baby gifts we received that will last a lifetime.”