A little bit of effort and understanding can go a long way with teens

The word “riot” conjures images of rebellion and can inspire fear. Ironically, the word “teenager” invokes similar images for some adults. In the late 1980s, Sonic Youth debuted Teen Age Riot—a song that was heralded as an anthem for disenfranchised youth from a band that was notorious for snubbing the establishment. The lyrics from that song are still fitting today: “It better work out / I hope it works out my way / 'Cause it’s getting kind of quiet in my city’s head / Takes a teen age riot to get me out of bed right now.”

A lot has changed in the past 20 years, but teenage angst is still alive and well. Today’s kids feel despised and ignored, and know they’re viewed by advertisers as sources of expendable income. Whether it’s due to an unsupportive administration or a lack of experience working with teens, too many libraries only provide lip service to this demographic. Teen services have to be more than an afterthought if libraries want to develop lifelong users. The easy part for most librarians is saying “yes” to serving teens. The hard part is getting it right. To help, here’s a list of things you should never do when working with teens:

Denounce technology. Technology is here to stay. Teens need a place to check their e-mail and play online games, and the library has it all for free. Teens may initially come in to go online, but they’ll come back for more once they understand the library’s a safe, teen-friendly environment to ask for help.

Belittle teens’ use of technology. A perfect example of this is RuneScape, the online multiplayer adventure game that’s sweeping the nation and turning once library-phobic teens into frequent visitors. Just that fact alone is enough to make me a RuneScape fan. How can we use this to our advantage? Hold RuneScape tournaments and gaming nights, and I guarantee it will lead to teens checking out graphic novels and books on cheat codes. Sooner or later, you’ll develop relationships with teens who only months ago wouldn’t set foot in the library.

I may not play RuneScape myself, but you can bet I know what it is and how to play the first round just to start a conversation with a leery teen. The way I see it, RuneScape is a win-win for everyone who understands that getting teens into the library is the greatest obstacle to teen services.

Make the rules, and expect teens to obey them. Instead, ask teens to create their own library regulations. I know from experience that if you give teens a chance, they’ll take the task to heart and come up with better policies than you could have imagined. Do a Google search for “teen advisory groups” and you’ll see pages of examples of success stories. Teens need to feel in charge of something—give them a place to express themselves freely and you just might be surprised by the results.

Take things personally. If a teen is having a bad day (and this happens on a fairly regular basis) and he takes it out on you—remember that it’s not about you. I’m not suggesting you allow teens to walk all over you, I’m just saying that the best thing to do when a teen’s having a bad day is to stay out of his way. Don’t ask a teen to explain his erratic behavior because he may not want to share it with you or be able to verbalize his feelings. Start every day as a new day, and you’ll be surprised how much easier it is to work with the teens in your library.

Be uptight about things that don’t matter. Sometimes what a teen needs most is a calm adult who understands that eating chips in the library won’t lead to the end of civilization as we know it.

Lose your sense of humor. This is probably the most important thing to remember when it comes to creating and maintaining relationships with teens. Based on my experience with adolescents, lighthearted banter and a friendly demeanor will diffuse the most awkward situation. Humor is a great way to bridge the gap between us and them, and it goes a long way toward creating an inviting space for teens.